Before you learn about the fabled NBA Superstar Swamp Creatures, you should know the deep and storied history of basketball as a sport.

Basketball was originally not a sport at all, but more of a type of board game made by two grown men who never married. The "ball" was a peach, and it was moved about the "court" which was actually a ping pong table with baskets taped to the end of each side. At the end of the game, the winner got to eat the peach. Originally called basketpeach, it became a more physical sport when the two men who invented it decided they should get in better shape if they ever wanted to attract females.

They took their game to the tennis courts, which are basically enlarged ping pong tables, and replaced the peach with a small handheld ball a little bigger than a lacrosse ball (lacrosse had not been invented yet but given that it exists now this is a fair comparison).

Once they realized the ball was much bouncier than a peach, they invented dribbling. They put two laundry baskets at the end of each side of the court with the intention of getting the ball into the basket. Then they were like, "we should probably call this basketball since we don't use peaches anymore." While the fruit was no longer involved at an official capacity, it was still tradition for the winner to receive a peach at the end of the game.

Recovered photo of original Peachbasket game.

While these two maniacs were gunking up the tennis courts with their non-tennis playing, people started to take notice. Tennis players quickly became interested in the "sport" and began playing it instead of tennis. The owner of the tennis courts - Howard T. Bizniss - was a brilliant entrepreneur who saw dollar signs. He built additional courts specifically dedicated to basketball, and thus the modern day game began.

The NBA
The NBA was formed by the same business-minded court creator when he decided he could make even more money off of forming an association. Everyone knows associations are cash cows. He introduced basketball to the entirety of the US and everyone was like, yeah this is actually a lot better than tennis.

Ultimately the prized peaches were phased out since peach season is such a small window, and peaches were quickly replaced with trophies and Nike contracts.

We owe much of what basketball is today to Howard T. Bizniss, but let's never forget the two lonely men who invented the sport.

The Swamp Creatures are a team sponsored by SwampCo and affiliated with the Swamplord Megaplex.

When the owners of SwampCo decided they needed to diversify the Megaplex, they did what every business mogul knows what to do - join an association. In this case, it was the Nationwide Basketball Association, or as many of you know it, the NBA (because people can't speak in more than like, three syllables).

The Swamp Creatures started out as all rookie teams do - in fact, they only won 4 championships in their first 5 years of playing. Embarrassing. The first coach - Godric R. Bazzket - was fired and replaced with the person that will live forever in the saga of the NBA. That person is Kipper Von Swampdrick. Kipper led The Swamp Creatures to absolute smash victories for the remainder of his career, which was ended abruptly when he choked on a peach pit.

The Swamp Creatures dominated the field for SO long that the NBA ultimately had to make rules to essentially level the playing court. Below are a sample of a few rules that were instated to disadvantage The Swamp Creatures:

- No Gatorade, The Swamp Creatures have to drink discounted thirst quenching knockoff beverage.
- The team must choose one player each quarter to play with one hand tied behind his back.
- The team must have at least one woman playing on their team.
- No socks.
- No cheerleaders
- The mascot (The Swamp Creature) must be submerged in the thirst quenching knockoff beverage before appearing on court during half time.

Kipper Von Swampdrick with Swampy the mascot.

The Swamp Creatures are a team sponsored by SwampCo and affiliated with the Swamplord Megaplex.

When the owners of SwampCo decided they needed to diversify the Megaplex, they did what every business mogul knows what to do - join an association. In this case, it was the Nationwide Basketball Association, or as many of you know it, the NBA (because people can't speak in more than like, three syllables).

The Swamp Creatures started out as all rookie teams do - in fact, they only won 4 championships in their first 5 years of playing. Embarrassing. The first coach - Godric R. Bazzket - was fired and replaced with the person that will live forever in the saga of the NBA. That person is Kipper Von Swampdrick. Kipper led The Swamp Creatures to absolute smash victories for the remainder of his career, which was ended abruptly when he choked on a peach pit.

The Swamp Creatures dominated the field for SO long that the NBA ultimately had to make rules to essentially level the playing court. Below are a sample of a few rules that were instated to disadvantage The Swamp Creatures:

- No Gatorade, The Swamp Creatures have to drink discounted thirst quenching knockoff beverage.
- The team must choose one player each quarter to play with one hand tied behind his back.
- The team must have at least one woman playing on their team.
- No socks.
- No cheerleaders
- The mascot (The Swamp Creature) must be submerged in the thirst quenching knockoff beverage before appearing on court during half time.

Despite these stringent rules, The Swamp Creatures continued to dominate the courts. Conspiracy theories and rumors abounded as the team seemed to be indestructible. Below is a small compilation of some of the more popular theories from various online forums:

- The Swamp Creatures have a Voodoo priestess on staff that hexes the other teams before each game.
- The Swamp Creatures are literally from an otherwordly swamp that breeds star basketball players.
- Bill Gates invented 5G and only gave The Swamp Creatures the antidote so everyone else played like shit.
- Kipper Von Swampdrick had an insane cocaine problem.
- The Swamp Creatures were controlled by the moon much like the ocean's tides and somehow their winning games lined up perfectly to the moon's influence.

Of course, people will always try to find reasons to excuse what is actually pure, raw talent. The Swamp Creatures are winners regardless of the reasoning behind it.

SwampCo's decisions to start a team has allowed them to support the Swamplord Megaplex, and completely financed the brand new renovation of the Megaplex's food court.